I spent 33+ years as a field officer for the GCHQ, the first 20 as a commissioned combat officer & the last thirteen-plus as a deep-cover Major Lieutenant., During that time, I forsook meaningful relationships for the sake of my missions and nearly died 100 times over. It was a lonely, grueling lifestyle & it did a lot to frame my thoughts on monogamy & the sanctity of relationships.
https://www.chirho.consulting/blog/thoughts-on-monogamy-and-celibacy-from-a-former-espionage-agent